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Hi, I'm Susan. I was a far-away living adult child whose parents died during this decade. (Mother predeceased my dad by three years.) I continue to be a far-away-living daughter-in-law (her only "daughter") of my husband's inspirational mother, R, who still lives independently in her home at age 97.
I am a counselor-educator-writer with a Masters degree from the Counseling Psych Dept., Teachers College, Columbia U. My almost 30-year career has been as a counselor at one of the top public high schools in the country.
Human development, human behavior and relationships have always interested me. In the mid-80's Helping Children of Divorce, my first book, was published. I've just finished a book for adult children of relatively healthy, independent-living, aging parents and, until it finds a publisher, I want to share some information, ideas and insights from it.
About This Blog
We train. We get ready for the important parts of our lives: childbirth, preschool, driving, SATs, higher education, jobs, professions. But who gets ready for--or even thinks about how to best help--older parents... until a dramatic health event that necessitates thoughtful, quick action leaves us scrambling.
If you have older parents this blog is for you, for your parents and grandparents.
It's not about care-giving. Rather it's about helping older people age well, with tips for empowering and being supportive. I know this sounds so basic, but it has become clear to me it doesn't happen automatically.
As my parents aged I became aware of a sharp contrast: the ever-present enormous physical and emotional energy of my teenage counselees struggling to develop confidence, assert independence, increase relationships and have fun, while my parents' generation was trying desperately to hold onto these aspects of living.
The juxtaposition of these struggles led to a disturbing realization: we conscientiously encourage and support younger people who have a full life ahead but--often unwittingly-- diminish and devalue older people. The implications are clear. Younger people feel good about their ability to move forward, while many older people feel "what's the use, I'm old" leading to problems for them and for their children.
This is where adult children can--and do-- make a difference.
• The Right Start Saves Many Problems • Will Actions Empower or Diminish? • Get All Possible Information Before • Does the Quick Fix Harm Later Goals? • Is it Better for Me or for My Parents? • Are Life and Limb Threatened? • Airplane Advice Applies-- Secure Your Mask First, Then Help Others
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