Aging Parents: Feel-Good Outing Ideas~ After A Long, Cold Winter

2013 Philadelphia Flower Show


Feel-Good Outings

Aging parents needn't be couch potatoes to feel depression or cabin fever due to a harsh winter. It's easy fo anyone! Cold, an absence of sunshne, and slippery sidwalks can make anyone feel cranky, if not depressed. "Trapped in the house," "Looking at the four walls." I've heard these expressions from elders.

And "cranky" may not go away easily. Negatives like a bad health diagnosis, another friend's problem, the world's problems, not to mention loss of a friend, pet, or part of a support system (dentist, hair dresser) add to being miserable.

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Older Traveler, Limited Mobility, Abroad Aboard a Barge at 79--What We Learn

A gray-haired woman, bent over her walker, was moving somewhat awkwardly towards our group and the private bus that was taking us to the Gare de Lyon in Paris. We would then board the TJV for a barge trip in Burgundy.  Although 99-year-old, Sr. Advisor R has said "DON'T ASSUME" countless times, I did assume this woman wasn't traveling on our barge. WRONG!

Initially I didn't know her age, nor that she was accompanied by a sister--11 years younger. While I do know that affect influences our first impression of people and while I've been trained, as a counselor, to be objective and nonjudgmental, barge travel isn't luxury liner travel. It involves a degree of mobility--at minimum navigating steps to get to the bedrooms and bathrooms below deck, and often walking ladder-like steps with railings and a gangplank to get from the barge to often  unmanicured terrain--all this before reaching the point of interest.

In  six days I watched a 79-year-old......

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Aging Parents and Travel: Advice from a 99-year-old Who Plans One More Trip

TRAVEL: Any vacation that requires little more than a short car ride to a familiar place involves more organization, thought and energy than it did pre-911 in the US. Understandably this can be daunting to old and older travelers when airport navigation and unfamiliar territory are involved, not to mention stress for anyone accompanying an older individual.

Sr. Advisor R, who--at age 98-- flew alone cross-country to visit us last year, just said she had one more trip in her (she will be 100 in September); so I asked if she'd share her thoughts about travel and how she does it.

To begin we need to keep in mind:

1. "Energy level changes. My renewed energy doesn't renew as it used to...maybe because I don't sleep as well. You have to think about everything--it isn't that one doesn't want to travel but you're not as confident when you're old. That's what age is. For old people it's not the world we knew....we don't know what to depend on."

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98-year-old Mother-in-law's Visit cont.

A woman who takes pride in her independence, R is creative about making things work out for herself. But in a strange hotel room, she wasn’t so inclined. The thermostat (room was too cold–we reset it); the TV remote (looked like hers, but the channels had different numbers necessitating reading the accompanying chart, which we explained but she said she was too tired to focus); and the telephone, which had a zillion strange buttons was challenging. None of these would cause us more than a few moments hesitation–but they were a change and as such, presented challenges to her taken-for-granted way of living. While confident and able to adapt to any new problems she encountered in her own home, she lacked the energy and will required to learn something temporary at this stage of life.




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Aging Parents and the Airport Body Scanner

Having parents and grandparents come for a visit is usually very special for far-away-living children and grandchildren. To ensure the travel process isn't derailed by unpleasant experiences, we want to be certain they are aware of the bulleted facts above... travel information to help parents and grandparents age well.

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