As I've mentioned on several occasions, the head of services for the elderly at a family counseling agency once told me that the child who would be caregiver for her/his aging parents could be identified early on--"the other children weren't so involved." It took me by surprise. Nevertheless, although my husband and I moved far from our families, I always knew I would be there for my parents when the time came.
Does this negate commonly-held beliefs that children take on the caregiver role for other reasons? (guilt, the realization parents did for them and it's payback time, the good feeling that helping others imparts, this sibling needs a life etc. etc.)
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I returned home Sunday to a front door that would not unlock (from outside or inside), the smell of gas due to a pilot light that went out, and a car that wouldn't start so I was carless, with a large accumulation of mail. I'm very behind in my life......So please ponder the question until tomorrow when I'll apply it to real life as I complete this post. And go to http://helpparentsagewell, my other site, to view it more fully.