AGING PARENTS: Caregivers, Nurturing Nurses and Vision

Following up....

Yes, male aides or caregivers--because of their physical strength, do help aging parents--men especially--to feel more confident and secure, according to one currently hospitalized grandfather in his 70's. His take: the nurturing and gentle nature that female nurses provide in a hospital setting is wonderful--"kind of like a mother" and very much appreciated after serious major surgery in his case. And he never gave a second thought to "privacy" issues when being bathed.

On the other hand, this grandfather was quick to mention the very attractive blonde woman--a "Fellow" who was part of the surgeon's team that visited him each day--as well as the attractive and very able physical therapist.

This reminded me of my father's emergency quintuple bypass surgery in southern California when he was 76. The heart surgeon (who a few years later had among his patients a former president of the United States) had put together a highly experienced team of good looking men and very pretty women. Prior to surgery, patients received a small booklet with photos--explaining each team member's background and hobbies.

My unmarried brother's spirits picked up when he met a very beautiful team member and I remember saying to my brother something like: Dr. X's patients aren't going to die--the men are going to want to see the women team members again and the women are going to want to wake up and see the handsome men.

No doubt it was the surgeon's skill, but the team had to be an asset. It not only helped aging parents to feel better about the situation (Mom and Dad), but it gave us all something to talk about which diverted our minds from a serious situation. And Dad lived to be 94.
* * *
Today I also heard from an 86-year-old woman who said she needed to tell me that the lighted pocket magnifying glass is the best for older people. She has vision problems and uses it daily--many times. As stated in an earlier Mother's Day Gifts post, it truly helps parents age well and at $9.99 how can you go wrong?

As we try to help aging parents, hearing your thoughts and being able to pass them on to others through this blog, helps us reach our goal--to help parent age well. Thank you.

Aging Parents: Gifts--Lighted Pocket Magnifying Glass Revisited--+1

I stopped by the Container Store to purchase lighted pocket magnifying glasses as Mother's Day gifts for older friends. (See last post.) Later that day, looking at my schedule for the following week, I was reminded that D's birthday was Wednesday.....A chance to check out reactions to this gift idea that I think can add quality to life--and thus our efforts to help parents and older friends age well.

We went to lunch and D opened the small package before the menus came. I knew she had vision problems; what I didn't know was that it was her 88th birthday. She phoned me later to say "thank you" and followed the phone call with a written note the next day. It provides some insights and says in part:

"Good friends become more and more important as years go on--I didn't think I needed anything--but you found the perfect present."

D used the magnifier to read the main menu and dessert menu. A waiter came to take dessert orders and I asked if he needed a Mother's Day gift idea for a mother or grandmother. He told us his mother was in her 80's, had vision issues, he knew that a Container Store was located near his home, and he was going there after work. Another waiter joined the conversation. Same reaction.

A few days later another Mother's Day gift suggestion came from a friend: A traditional picture frame with a picture of the entire family/families--all the children (and spouses if any) and grandchildren and great-grandchildren. It's nice to have the whole family inside one frame, it seems. This caused me to ask about the new frames enabled by technology. One former stock broker in her mid-late 60's said her children gave her one that "has never been out of the box." A capable computer-user, she just didn't want to be bothered downloading.

Which brings up the point that at a certain age, many people just don't want to be bothered with gifts involving unfamiliar technology.....even when they've used a computer at work for the better part of their life. So it would make sense to check it out with parents beforehand. If they're comfortable, go for It. If not, hopefully ideas from the last three posts are helpful.

As we try to help parents age well, check out the lighted pocket magnifying glass and-- if there's still time get every family member together-- you could arrange to have a family photo taken to put in a nice traditional frame.

**********

I'm interested to know which gift ideas you like best. Please comment below or use the gmail address at the right.